Some unexpected circumstances have attempted to put a damper on this holiday season. I was stricken with a temporary illness, a bad respiratory infection a few weeks ago. I am well on my way to recovering but my paycheck for December shall be dismal for my affliction.
Where I work, as with many companies, there is no pay for sick leave the first week and very little for any weeks to follow. Between feeling drained from the infection and dismal at the prospects of having the physical side (money) of Christmas more or less put on hold, I fretted about putting decorations up.
Should I or shouldn’t I?
We do not always put decorations up. When we haven’t it has still been a time of good spirit and frivolity. Christmas decorations do not make Christmas. It is the outlook and pleasure of being with those you love in thought and presence for me.
Last year I was genuinely looking forward to putting up decorations for our first Christmas in our new home but it was thwarted. Not by myself but by a colleague who decided to cause upheaval by going off on stress with the plan of taking the leave to find a new job and quitting before his leave was up at the start of the holiday season. Leaving those left to cover shifts often amounting to six days a week for many of us.
I was devastated. I had been forced to abandon my decorating for the Holiday because of my work hours. There was just no energy left in me. We did celebrate, my husband and I, but our first Christmas in our new home felt tainted by the spite of another. It was nothing more than spite toward management that caused all this grief.
It is one thing to choose to do or not to do something, it is another to be forced.
This current state of affairs is of no one’s blame but my own. (Last year was not really anyone’s fault but my own either to be honest. I allowed someone else’s actions to rule my mood and attitude.)
The only possible setback this year concerns money. Money is helpful in easing the way for things, true. Yet the spirit of the season is truly not dependent on any one solid thing. It is only dependent on one’s mind, heart and desires to create an atmosphere worthy of the holidays.
It is for that very reason that we spent a day moving the decorations down from the attic and several days finally getting them up. We may have to count our pennies (more than usual) this Holiday Season but I am determined not let that stand in the way of finding that special feeling and reveling in the spirit that this time of year brings.